Posts Tagged by Top 10

Top 10 comparable notions to “why men need to cheat”

  • Why women need to spend all your money (Seriously. There’s a sociological explanation for this…)
  • Why corporations need child labor
  • Why catholic priests need to molest little boys
  • Why children need to throw temper tantrums
  • Why governments needs to torture innocent people
  • Why societies need to have homeless people
  • Why republicans need to hate gays
  • Why bosses need to take advantage of their secretaries (the psycho- socio subordination justification)
  • Why most customer services need to be frustratingly apathetic
  • Why rich people need to get everything free.

TOP TEN CLUES to His Emotional Unavailability

• He stiffens like a board when you hug him suddenly
• No return gesture (if you say or do something nice)
• Times together are promptly followed by longer periods apart
• You always initiate the interactions
• Ambiguous behavior (you can’t decide whether he’s nice or a douche-bag)
• Random texts/ emails, but no phone calls
• All talk and no show
• Already in a relationship/ married
• He buries himself in his work
• He disappears

TOP TEN SIGNS That He’s a Cheap Bastard

• He wants to continue to get to know you over coffee
• He mistakenly forgets his wallet home
• He won’t have a drink on the date
• It’s okay for you to leave the tip
• He breaks out a calculator to quantify the tip amount
• He expects to go dutch
• He reminds you of how much money he has spent
• He avoids potentially expensive activity that you’re interested in
• He offers to cook for you at his house one of your first dates (i.e. heat up a pizza)
• He drives ridiculously far away from wherever you guys are trying to get to save 5% on parking.

HE’S GAY… TOP TEN RED FLAGS

  • He likes to make ‘friends’ at the gym
  • His closet seems color coded
  • You always have to make the first move with him
  • He’s anal (hence the term)
  • He likes your shoes… a lot
  • He has  piercings in places other than his ear
  • He can’t stand gay guys (flagrant homophobia)
  • He’s snotty and harbors disdain for the woman he is with
  • You catch him checking out another dude.
  • He prefers rail thin girls or androgynous women (the next logical step being…)